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a story... (no title yet)

 
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littleMiss



Joined: 28 Feb 2006
Posts: 37

PostPosted: Tue Apr 04, 2006 10:37 am    Post subject: a story... (no title yet) Reply with quote

We sat in the large, lonely stone kitchen, staring at each other over the morning cup of coffee. The daily grind had begun to sink in again, and the thought of yet another lonely day at home alone petrified me. The thought of calling You away from work in the afternoon intrigued me, though the gloom of last night’s thunderstorm still lingered as I looked out the window. Before I realize what is going on, You’ve kissed my cheek goodbye and headed out the door. By the time I’ve gotten to the door to try to catch You, Your car is already backing out the drive and disappearing down the street. As the tears well, I decide that I must do whatever I can to break the monotony. As I sit down in the library looking out into the open field and forest that we call a backyard, I realized something: You’d stopped noticing me. So, as I planned the day ahead, I hoped that the rain wouldn’t let up. The hours pass, and the plans fall quickly into place.
As you sit in the office in yet another endless meeting, You look out to see only sheets of grey, wet and dull. You dread the thought of another meeting, and suddenly You receive a text saying “urgent. Come home now.” As you fear the worst, You rush home in a panic, only to find the door ajar and the house darkened. As you cautiously step across the threshold, You bellow a booming “hello?’ throughout the house but to no avail. The furniture overturned, the windows thrown open. You think to yourself, nothing good can come of this… as You rush through the house You see the tall grass of the back beaten down as if someone ran in fear. As You run, following the trail further and further You lose Your shoes. The grass turns to woods, and the bleak sunlight disappears. The sunlight and rain is all but a distant memory and as the darkness of the woods is about to overtake you, candles suddenly begin to appear at your feet. The warm, dryness of the woods renews a sense of security, however small it may be. As the light of the candles grows, a clearing suddenly appears, with a large wooden table ringed with fire. The sight confounds you, but the sight is not to last for long. Suddenly, a soft, smooth fabric covers your eyes, and your hands are suddenly immobile. As you try to struggle, a gentle hand leads yours to the edge of the fire, and you feel the warmth at your feet. The warmth feels so good after the cold, bone-soaking rain that has drenched your clothes to the point where your suit has clung to every inch of Your body. Suddenly the rain-soaked trousers are ripped off your legs and then your socks, as You feel yourself harden with the cold and the sudden shock. You hear the crackle of the fire, the crackle when you are led over the flames, the tickle of the heat singeing the hairs on the back of Your calves. You tense even more with delight, and somehow, anticipation of what is to come. As You are led forward, the fire slowly fades and dirt turns to sand. The feeling of the sand between Your toes feels so good after the wet of the mud from the storms. All of a sudden, the strange person in control of you throws you violently forward, as you feel the sudden jerk of the table jut into your stomach. The wood feels remarkably wonderful after the fearful journey so far, warm, and barely damp. As You are rolled over by the stranger, the binds that keep your hands are suddenly freed- only to be replaced by heavy gauge iron manacles on your hands and feet. You feel suddenly ashamed, wondering if this was how “she” came to her end, out here in the cold. Nothing good can come of this…yet, somehow, You can’t hide the fact that every moment of it is making you grow harder. A single tip, soft and smooth, hard, yet strangely familiar traces the line transversing your body, from the tip of Your nose, then down across your shoulders. The crackle of the fire grows louder, and the heat grows with intensity. The flames begin to lick the bottom of your heels, but with every passing moment, the intensity within You grows, the tension within you wells up. A voice whispers, “that is not allowed.” You try to hold itself back for fear of retribution from the mysterious captor. What little You could not hold back trickles out the very tip of you, warm and glistening as you try hard to hide Your shame. You feel the sudden heat lick back up once more, enveloping Your heels and feet. A coolness overtakes You, a new sensation that calms and soothes. As the cool quickly flashes to warmth and back to cool, you are intrigued by this new sensation. Part fear, part intrigue, this strange new feeling finally overtakes You, and the fear slowly slips into passion and enticement. The flames lick across your body, and the cooling sensation following quickly passes. The sudden sensation of touch reminds You once more that you are not alone in this place, that there is someone else here. The touch turns from a single sensation to a wider one, warm and flat, gliding across the small of your stomach and southward. You think to yourself, Oh god, no… not now. Please not now, I can’t have them see me like this- turned on by a complete stranger. And I don’t even know if it’s a man or woman. The warmth, You realize, is not just any warmth. The firm grip slides further down Your stomach to the very edge of Your shaft, tickling as the fingers slowly circle all of You, in all Your hardness. You feel the warmth of a body brush up against You, warm, but what gender no longer matters as the feelings of pleasure surges through Your entire being. The warm hand glides firmly yet surprisingly gently up and down Your shaft, strong and controlled. The smooth strokes edge you closer and closer to the brink, leaving Your will almost completely unable to control any longer. The slightest falter in Your control leaves You helpless to stop it, the cum begins to flow, and it takes all You have to keep from getting any more obvious to Your mysterious captor. The motion, the elating motion has suddenly ceased, as the hand disappears from Your being. A crushing sense of devastation suddenly washes over You as you realize that You cannot even remember what brought You out here, only that You are not here of Your own will. A single finger, moist and strangely scented touches Your nose, then Your lips. The saltiness amuses you slightly, and suddenly the realization of what You taste hits You- it’s You. The thought turns you on again, thinking of what deviousness this person has in mind. As You feel Yourself harden again, the cool of the rainy, afternoon air suddenly disappears for a warmth; wet and wonderful. The motion, smooth and refined, cannot do anything but make You grow even harder, enjoying every moment of this strange day. The strokes grow harder, more violent; stronger, then suddenly…. Slowing to a smooth, sustained, teasing strokes, teasing the very head of Your cock with the cool breeze of the air, and then suddenly plunging back into the warm, wet safety of the stranger. The tension of it all finally pulls you under after the long ordeal, as You feel the gentle touch of hands running along Your chest, kissing all the way up. As you feel Your neck being kissed, slowly kissing up to your jawline, the stranger thrusts harder and harder, bringing you closer to the brink. This person seems to know every point, every inch of Your body, turning You on more and more with every touch. The long, softly manicured fingernails run through your hair, teasing You by tugging on the blindfold. Suddenly, You hear a male voice scream “NO! don’t!” as You realize the voice You hear is Your own, the hand slides gently away from the blindfold, turning instead toward the manacles attaching Your hands to the table. As the fingers trace your arm, suddenly You feel a nibble on your right ear, making it that much harder to control Yourself. You hear a whisper, “cum, now.” So, without a second thought, You finally give in to the desire. A feeling of pure ecstasy flows over you, and You hear the key to the manacle *click* in the locks, freeing your hands to reveal your captor.
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littleMiss



Joined: 28 Feb 2006
Posts: 37

PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 12:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

hey, i've noticed a few people have read this so far, and was really hoping that I might get some opinions on this story... It's the absolute first one I have ever written, and would like some feedback on what to do to improve, etc.
Thanks!
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ScorpioSub



Joined: 09 Apr 2006
Posts: 47

PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 12:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I promise to read it and offer any helpful suggections I can once I'm done fighting with these freakin' computers *grumble grumble*

Though I have to warn you, the only stuff I've written that could even be called anything like erotica is stuff I wrote to my former Sir for Him to enjoy... So, I'm by no means an expert...

LOL
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littleMiss



Joined: 28 Feb 2006
Posts: 37

PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 1:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

this was written for my Master, and his one big complaint was the ending.... I guess males don't like to be teased like that
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ScorpioSub



Joined: 09 Apr 2006
Posts: 47

PostPosted: Tue Apr 11, 2006 5:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I don't particularly like ebing left hanging at the end of a story either LOL

PS that is definitely a mindfuck! LOL
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